In an eye-opening revelation about modern relationships, recent studies and surveys suggest that approximately 50% of women currently in a relationship have a “backup partner” in mind. This “Plan B” is an individual they could potentially turn to should their current relationship end, sparking conversations about trust, emotional security, and the complexities of love in the digital age.
The Details Behind the Trend
A widely cited survey of 1,000 women found that nearly half admitted to having a fallback partner waiting in the wings. The study, reported by outlets like the Daily Mail, indicated that married women were even more likely than those in unmarried relationships to have a backup plan in place.
But who are these secret stand-ins? According to the research, the role of a backup is often filled by:
- An old friend who has harbored romantic feelings for some time.
- An ex-boyfriend or even an ex-husband.
- A colleague from work or a friend from the gym.
The connections to these backup partners are not always fleeting. One in ten women surveyed reported that their “Plan B” had already confessed their feelings for them, and some had known their backup for as long as seven years. Perhaps most startling, about 12% of women admitted that their emotional connection to the backup was even stronger than the feelings they had for their current partner.
Why Keep a Partner on the Back Burner?
Relationship experts suggest this phenomenon isn’t necessarily about planning to cheat or actively seeking to end a current relationship. Instead, it often stems from a deep-seated need for emotional security in an unpredictable world.
- A Psychological Safety Net: Having a backup can act as a buffer against the pain of a potential breakup, providing a sense of comfort and stability. Dr. Romy Moussa, a physician and mindful living expert, noted that the need for a backup plan often comes from a person’s own insecurities and difficulties feeling secure in a relationship, rather than any fault of their current partner.
- Adapting to Modern Love: The pressures of modern life, from career goals to personal growth, have made relationships more complex. A backup partner can reduce the societal pressure to find “the one” immediately, allowing for a more measured approach to commitment.
- The Influence of Social Media: Experts also point to the role of social media platforms like Facebook and Twitter, which make it easier than ever to maintain connections with old flames and friends, keeping potential backups within easy reach.
A survey highlighted in multiple media reports reveals that approximately 50% of women in relationships have a “backup partner” — someone they could potentially turn to if their current relationship ends. This backup is usually a friend, ex-boyfriend, colleague, or long-time…
— Raphousetv (RHTV) (@raphousetv2) August 1, 2025
Ethical Questions and Relationship Red Flags
The concept of a backup partner inevitably raises ethical questions about loyalty and betrayal. While some partners may openly joke about it, many feel uncomfortable with the idea. Experts stress that open communication is crucial. If both partners are aware of and consent to the dynamic, it might be manageable, but it often points to deeper issues within the relationship.
This trend is also linked to other concerning relationship behaviors like “pocketing,” where one partner intentionally hides the other from their friends and family. Psychotherapist Dr. Chandni Tugnait explains that pocketing can be a sign that a partner is not ready for commitment, fears judgment, or may even be seeing other people simultaneously. Keeping a partner secret can be a way to maintain control and keep options open, which can be a red flag for trust and manipulation issues.
Ultimately, while the headline figure is jarring, the trend of backup partners speaks to a broader human desire for security in an uncertain world. It highlights a growing anxiety in modern romance and underscores the foundational importance of open communication, trust, and mutual commitment in any healthy relationship.
